Don't be deceived. The post below is "the story" with more added to it. Expect that to happen a whole lot until I complete it. I type a while, and it's like I am in the moment, reliving it. I've not really ever replayed it all for myself, nor have I really gotten down and told it to anyone, so (as lame as it sounds) it's kind of intense. Tap-tap, think, tap-tap some more, sink back in time, tappity-tap-tap, become overwhelmed, check out until I am able to append to the original. *STEP A-WAAAAAY FROM THE EMOTIONAL ROLLERCOASTER, LADY!!*

The preschoolers are marching in a little line past my front walk, giggling and shouting excitedly. It makes me want to laugh and cry all at the same time.

I am ignoring the phone today, as I have given myself the day off. Mostly everyone is okay with that, but it is apparently driving my ex-husband crazy. He has left no less than 10 voice mails (none of an emergency nature....I checked, because I am not THAT callous) over something that really can wait. Have I ever told you that he has OCD in the biggest, most horrible way? He cycles on and off his meds regularly, and won't utilize any of the stress-reduction/self-distracting tricks that he's been taught. This, of course, makes my dealing with him consistently lovely, as I have only the patience to hear him repeat himself to me twice before I shut the door in his face/hang up the phone. I musn't forget to tell you how I include the hearty, "FUCK OFF, BIFF" before any shutting or hanging up goes on. "Good Lord, man!" I exclaim to him, "I divorced you so I wouldn't have to put up with your shit....don't you get it??" Sometimes he does, sometimes he doesn't.

But, he pays his child support early ALWAYS and never hesitates to fork over his share for picturesfieldtripsorganizedsportsbirthdays
holidaysmedicalexpensesfinefurniturenewunderweargeneralpurposes and that is a factoid that I never fail to recognize, because so many men are shits in that regard. And he is religious about getting all the time with the kids that the courts and I will allow, because he loves them wholeheartedly in his own paranoid, emotionally-stunted manner. My dad --and so many others at last count-- didn't give me that much, so I abjectly put up with Biff's crap because there is some good that comes along with it. I'm not so stupidly pigheaded that I don't see that much.

And because I love you, I give you this and this. *slaps you on yer bottom* Now go to hell have fun, champ.